everything is compared to something

What measure do people use to gauge their emotions? I have always compared my emotions to other experiences I have, or to experiences of others that I know. But there must be some norm of emotional description that I am missing out on, or maybe that is right under my nose but I refuse to see. After all, not everyone can scientifically reason their emotions against a numerical scale, which is, in essence, what I have been doing for the past 15 years of my life. I had thought that taking a system of measurement and modifying it to accuracy was the best method of development. Much like our modern system of measurement; created over thousands of years, changing with the times to suit the people using it. That's what I have been doing, developing a system to suit me. But what if I was wrong? What if the system I have been using is faulty, hard to use, in short, complete shit? Maybe I should change to the metric system, universal, easy to transpose, less complex. Measures of ten are easier to memorize than 16 cups to the gallon.



You may be wondering what brought about this rant; I have been thinking back to a conversation I had with my significant other, about my mother, and how I measure her emotion. I have been comparing myself to my siblings, to my father, to my friends, for all these years; why? What good has it done me? Why can't I simply say this is the emotion, and this is the degree to which I feel it? why must it be "so and so is happier than me"? Such negative thinking does nothing for me, and it means that I don't have a problem with "so and so" being happier than me, but I have a problem with myself. But today that changes. When this conversation took place, I was blown away at the statement "why must you compare yourself to others?". I didn't understand how all of my stress could be tied to such a simple question. Since then I have continually thought, while I use such comparisons, "why am i doing this? why do I have to compare my self to 'so and so'?". And today, I realize that I don't have to make those comparisons anymore, I am stronger than that. I have no need to scale myself against another; at least not in a negative way. :)



I have a very wise man to thank for this revelation today. His words, as always, float in my head while I ponder everything from the complexity of the universe, to my next meal. It was he who told me, "There is always a solution to all issues". You are right darling, once I understand that there is a solution to all issues, the answer comes out of the shadows and reveals itself. :)